Mmm, what you say?
Mm, that you only meant well? Well, of course you did.
Mmm, what you say?
Mm, that it's all for the best? Ah of course it is.
Mmm, what you say?
Mm, that it's just what we need? And you decided this.
Mmm what you say?
What did she say?
Yes, it is good that I am listening to yesterday's song. I will not fear. I am working ferociously to keep on charging ahead, keep up my feeling of having the right to feel, to be, to do. And wonderful, lovely bear called - I think we're on the third hour speaking now - and told me, among other things, just that. No excuses. Do it. Feel! Be! Dream! DO!
He said a lot of other good things, too. I'm happy we had our little spat some weeks ago, it cleared the air real well.
"Dig out that anger and everything and Deal With It!!!"
I will. It scares the hell out of me, but, okay, I will. Tomorrow. After school, I'll get home and light that candle I bought especially for introspection, and I will open myself up.
It freaks me out.
I am afraid. But I will do it. Try, at least. That's what the quote is for. As over as I am, there is still one issue containing several others I need to deal with. Bear most certainly might have been right with his suggestion that there are still things about it, and maybe even behind it - what was it that made me LET it happen to me? And there are things even further back. I guess I will get to those in time, too.
Yes, I won't fear love. I won't fear feelings. I will let myself. It's a bit like running as fast as I can, forward, forward, never stopping, running over anything coming in my path be it stones or fallen trees or brooks, with fierce happiness and a smile on my lips, urging myself ever on and never, never tiring. I'm not kidding myself, I'm not going to let myself do that. I won't fear love.
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