Anga

...means "iron" in Quenya.


Saturday. No lrping. Tech Noir instead. Wore long skirt and the "Necessary Evil" jacket, put in the clips with UV-reflectant ribbons, put up hair, did an awesome job of a makeup with mainly the green StarGazer eyeshadow. Went there, handed jacket in, went up and started the main dancefloor (dear gods, people, where'd the GOOD music go? I can, but I won't, dance to such hits as... urhg, yeah, eighties, nineties, they had lots of good alternative music, but please, radio hits, leave them be).

And there he was.

Again.

The creep from last time. Touching. So I made it clear in no uncertain terms that no, lay it off. Touchey touchey again. I got physical. Him and his mate still didn't leave me be entirely, but kept me always between the both of them, albeit at a distance of a few metres. So I went downstairs.
...and they came after me. Which was when I sort of didn't really have that little neat stoplight on anymore, but grabbed his curly disgusting hair and told him to let me the feth be.
Cue a female guard, me growling precisely why and what, and then being asked to follow her outside the room so she could hear what I was saying. I remember only rage, and telling her how he had decided to touch me last time I was there as well, and what he had done upstairs, which she hadnae seen. She said sure, that's what I'm here for, why did you nae come to me? We were keeping our eyes on them anyways. Are you all right?
No, I'm not, I said, and went to the ladies' room, dabbing my eyes and checking my makeup, and preparing to go the feth home. Waste of money, waste of time, waste of a good makeup.
But then the darndest thing happened.
A guy I know only very briefly, through old, old Sweden by Night and now have met again through Stockholm by Night, turned up. So I said, oh, hey, you here! We got to talking, and he lifted his left hand, showing a ring. A light dawned on me, and I quickly switched one of my rings to the same finger on my own hand. He asked what music I dance to, I pointed outside, and then it turned out the way that he saved the entire bloody evening. We exchanged names, as we didnae know them before, and then danced the night away. Even found a third girl (who had, it turned out when we talked afterwards, seen the Creep and that he did basically the same thing if not worse to other girls) sitting forlornly on a couch and dragged her up as well to dance with us. I met some random strangers that he knew and I didn't, and even though the music in the end was too loud to hear even the beat, well, the evening was a success. I got into bed at the decadent hour of half past five. Marvellous.

Slept in until about three in the afternoon and found a new character, a song I can't remember and good choices for what colours to use on my wood elves between sleep and waking up.
And then I remembered I'd promised to join in on the staff hobby night, sort of, and dragged my very hung-over arse there. See, I don't need alcohol to get the full experience, not a drop. But a lot of water, some restorative Dakara-type drink and a Resorb later, plus two ibuprofen and one of my regular migraine pills later...
...I was fit to paint sparkly-ass Howling Banshee swords for five hours.

Had another visit to Bosön today, good thing that. Treatment only this time, no excercises. Damn but it felt good afterwards! I had a moment of painlessness!


I like how, suddenly, there's green everywhere.


And because it came into my head when my thoughts were running in the same circles again, I wanted to post the lyrics here. I am breaking, and I don't want to go either way that seems to present itself. It would be so much easier to be, you know, just straight, and monogamous, or at the very least just monogamous. But I am so incredibly much NOT. Thankfully, at least... there is that one person existing that does understand the chaos in my head. Who will listen, and just that. No need for replies. Thanks. You know who you are.

You understand the chaos in my head.
Only you understand every word I say.
You restore my soul and erase all hurt,
the hurt that only you can take away;
You keep me from breaking apart.

(Apoptygma Berzerk, "You keep me from breaking apart")