Between the shadows

Things are fucked up, but now that I've eaten lunch I feel better equipped to deal with them.
So, turns out my papers have not arrived to the SKR. Great. I sent them LAST WEEK. They're needed so that the slowpokes there can deal with them and then send me some papers I need for grading in Japan. And I won't even start about Richard, about the bloody trouble that we haven't even started looking into.
But you know - it's allright. I've come to terms with it. Sure, it nags me that maybe I won't be able to get my nidan after all (how come, honestly, that there's so much paperwork involved? and that it's such a trouble, after all I'm a member of the ZNKR in Japan too?), it nags me a lot, but I still will do the most important things.
Travel.
Meet Kuriyama-sensee, Oohara-sensee and some others.
Practice iai.
And that's what's important. It's not "8000 SKr wasted".

But I must admit I am stressed out, all over the place and rather unfocused.

Plus I got real sucky news. It doesn't really, directly, concern me, but it made me very sad nonetheless.

Then we have the small troubles, like exchange of money, packing, bus Tokyo-Akita and several other small concerns that makes my stomach turn into a small, icky knot. Well. I'm waiting for the "SAYONARA SUCKERS!!!"- and "Fuck you. All."-feeling to show up.
'Cuz I'm going to Japan, I'm going to travel, and it's MY adventure. I'll keep on charging ahead, not much else to do. I don't know what will happen, don't know what I'll do, don't know much about anything but I will still, pointy ears, wings and all, keep on. It's time to roll, baby...


Sorry everyone. Everyone and everybody. But I'm me now, and the concerns for other people must wait for a while.

__________________________________________

11:48 AM (Nov 9)

It's time to hit the road, baby. I'm going to do the last stuff, pack Vincent carefully in my handluggage and then...
Overslept, managed to get almost in time for lesson, flipped out over a Windows PC with a scanner - I swear, I NEVER EVER MET A SCANNER WHO WORKED FOR ME - and gave up this shit with grading. Whatever, SKR. Die and go to your private hell, kthxplz.
I wanted to meet with Rob this evening, but I guess there's no time. Poopers. I shall just have to be content snuggling with wolf, eat some pie and be all worked up over going away. Japan, Japan... oh dear. What on earth am I doing? Have a great two weeks, everyone!


Random, bewildered thought:
There's THREE of you?!