Celumë means "stream, flow".
A quick one, to be edited tomorrow.
Lrp was great, though not as awesometastic as 2006. However - I fucking made it. Kerael fucking made it. Two years of talking, wishing, thinking, wondering, dreaming and eventually - we made it. Gamael, beloved, oh Gamael, you are back now and it was not easy, neither was it a given, but you are back and we have danced together in the darkness and you said "This is only the beginning..."
I made it. I managed to give him a new body. And it didn't disturb the main thing on the lrp or anyone else, just like we wanted and planned and hoped.
Too bad the bomb has been dropped and the secret is out, but, you know...
Miss the simplicity of living like that. As usual. Gods, reality and me hate eachother.
Back here again, had a nice evening at this summer's main hangout, I think, Kapitelhusgården.
Picked up my new iaito. I'm not completely awed, because the tsuka is ginormous. By which I mean, it's longer and thicker than called for, concerning me. If this is because it is such a long iaito, fair enough, but it still makes the tsuba look tiny and it doesn't really fit me. Other than that, it's very nice.
Cloudwalker's cautious about the whole affair. I think she knows how I feel.
And then I got a mail saying my bloody essay has been passed! And I even got the highest grade for it. Woah. Just... wow? How did I do that?
Yeah. Time to sleep. Ah, Kerael, Gamael. Sleeping these two last nights have been a surreal experience. There's someone I want, need, desperately to meet. And that one is quite far away.
This is only the beginning...
Edit:
It's 3 AM and I'm listening to the soundtrack from "Amelie from Montmartre". Life suddenly seems as if it really can't be that bad.
Had a very rewarding chat with Rob via SL, too. No, life can't be that bad. In fact it can be absolutely awesome and wonderful.
It's 3 AM and I'm listening to the wonderful music from "Amelie Poulain". 3 AM and I'm swaying to wonderful music. I should sleep. I'm past the point of creativity, beside me lie papers filled with sketches of outfits for an icemage and a racist elf, an empty teacup still smells a little from the dream tea I drank and wolf is in bed, sleeping. I want life to be good. By stopping eating preventive pills, some of the chemical reasons as to why I've been screwed in the head are gone. I didn't go out all day today, I just reloaded the forums to see, new pictures, new posts? I put things where they belong, and I got to know my new sword better. I should have gone out. The summer is... too short.
All is too short. All is so limited. That time, and this time. The music tells me to live, to love, that things really aren't that complicated. Or that I can get through them alive. I live. I love. And it's not something I should do, to hide or hinder that. Maybe I am a satyr after all, the way I burn, the way I get burnt horribly. (9 months, you bastard). Maybe I am just a sidhe, the way I suffer. The way it takes years. Years. But the music is timeless. There's still time. Race on ahead, Elenaria, keep on charging and never let the obstacles hinder you! Remember your dreams - my dreams, all that remains in the end, but then again, all is a dream. I dream, and I live. I dream and I love. In dreams, there are no obstacles.
I think I can manage. I think I'll survive just a while more yet.
This is only the beginning...
To you, the words she said alone in the night. And to you, something similar.
Mai lómë.
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After a strange half-year in Japan - which is where and why this blog started - this elf now flits back and forth, both inside of her head and in the world. For the amusement and knowledge of others, it continues. The world is a strange place. Lest autumn come, wake me up!
About the pointy-ear
- Elenaria Cúthalion ni Aesin
- Writing mainly for those that are not directly connected to my life. Trying to stay free without breaking important bonds. Will do close to anything for a chance to travel, and never ever quits dreaming.
Links
The Way of Walking Alone
・Do not turn your back on the various Ways of this world.
・Do not scheme for physical pleasure.
・Do not intend to rely on anything.
・Consider yourself lightly, consider the world deeply.
・Do not ever think in acquisitive terms.
・Do not regret things about your own personal life.
・Do not envy another's good or evil.
・Do not lament parting on any road whatsoever.
・Do not complain or feel bitterly about yourself or others.
・Have no heart for approaching the path of love.
・Do not have preferences.
・Do not harbour hopes for your own personal life.
・Do not have a liking for delicious food for yourself.
・Do not carry antiques handed down from generation to generation.
・Do not fast so that it affects you physically.
・While it's different with military equipment, do not be fond of material things.
・While on the Way, do not begrudge death.
・Do not be intent on possessing valuables or a fief in old age.
・Respect the gods and the Buddhas, but do not depend on them.
・Though you give up your life, do not give up your honour.
・Never depart from the Way of the martial arts.
Miyamoto Musashi, Second Day of the Fifth Month, Second Year of Shoho [1645]
1. Think without any dishonesty.
2. Forge yourself in the Way.
3. Touch upon all of the arts.
4. Know the Ways of all occupations.
5. Know the advantages and disadvantages of everything.
6. Develop a discerning eye in all matters.
7. Understand things that cannot be seen by the eye.
8. Pay attention to even small things.
9. Do not involve yourself with the impractical.
Miyamoto Musashi, "For those who would study my martial art, there are rules for putting it into practice..."
4 comments:
"racist elf"?
Aye. Usually, the standard is to either don't care too much about the fact that other races are different, or a mild dislike or whatever (standard, to be truthful, can vary... I'm quite Tolkien-elvish when I play most characters).
This, however, will be something along the lines of "You are humans. Yuck. Also, you've fallen to the darkness. And you, calling yourselves elves? We're not so sure about your motives for doing what you do, and oh, by the way, you've fallen to darkness as well. Pointy ears you have, but you sure as hell aren't elvish to me..."
A bit racist. A bit fascist. Rather extreme. Not necessarily convinced of our own superiority, just about their inferiority. Been looking a lot in the Wood Elf army book, some wonderful inspiration there. MIGHT be interesting. Hopefully.
The elves of Ulthuan might regard the Wood Elves as being "lost", which is a subtle distinction from being evil. A "racist elf" might look more regal than sylvan. No green perhaps...
This would more be like the Wood Elves regarding the High Elves as being fallen (which, incidentally, is written somewhere in the army book, I think). But also, it's a lrp in the world of Nordrike, so it doesn't really have a connection there.
We're going to be discussing the whole idea a bit more. Seeing as how my favourite outfit is moving away from green into the realm of grey and greyish blue, I'm thinking of showing just how good one can look in green, too. Sort of turn it around - the racists consider the other group as being too far removed from the original, making a point of their connection to the woods. ...which is, in a way but not completely, the other way round from my favourite outfit/character/thingie. Only she's not racist and particularily hardline ^-^
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